Jaded.
I bought a ring in Morocco. A beautiful Jade ring that looks similar to a catepillar or sea urchin.
Simultaneously, I have become a jaded volunteer.
My perspective of my service (what I've been doing/not doing) is the elephant in the room.
I am truly missing America. Not the drug addict miss, like American food is, but a dull slow pull and realization that America actually is my home and is amazing.
I'm beginning to gain weight to an unhealthy amount.
The education system here is so faulty, it puts the San Andres faultline to shame. Such greed and selfish nature cause the few souls in the system who give a damn to be swallowed by the gigantic mouth of corruption.
I no longer care about those around me, when that has always been my focus--which maybe it's time to think about myself and do things for myself-I will indirectly help all those around me-it's my nature.
I wear my ring and I feel the jaded emotions pulsing through my hand and up into my mind.
I hope this ring is good for me, doesn't seem that way, for I've vowed to wear it on my left hand and will only replace it for a wedding band.
I believe the metals and stones you wear magnify and maybe alter your inner emotions.
I always thought turquoise was the best stone for me, but it always ran away. Every piece of turqouise I own is now lost to me. I thought jade was the alliance I needed alongside my quarts necklace. We'll see.
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